I don't know if I am the only one that ever has done this, but I am currently checking my email all the time. Obsessively. I had this same problem during college when I was applying for internships and dealt with 99% of the communications via email. Everyday I would come back from class and check to see whether one of the gazillion places I applied saw what a genius I was and couldn't live without me interning and getting their coffee during meetings. Even worse were the actual times when I did get an email back and I would sit there staring at the title in my inbox, anxious to read it and reticent to read potential bad news of rejection. That's how it goes with trying to get any type of work in the business world. You hang on the highs of maybe getting a yes and feel sad for the ones that say no, even if it was a job you didn't necessarily want. I applied for some internships that I never wanted, but was amazingly devastated by their rejections. How dare the company I don't want to work say they also don't want me! How dare they make this mutual! But the emails that said yes. Those emails have to be some of the most satisfying moments of college memories, like the insurance company that gave me a marketing gig at way more money per hour than any college kid should get. Getting the yes for Impact, my last job, was the most satisfying thing ever, and I can still remember how sweet that victory tasted in my mouth as I walked out of the building and knew I would have employment upon graduation, with a business I loved no less.
Unlike most people who get to enjoy the fruit of employment for more than four months however, due to the whole marriage and Army thing, I am again riding the carousel known as the job hunt. The days of combing search engines for nonprofit work, hours reading hits and then realizing I need 20 times the experience I have, and typing in criteria is starting to make my brain glaze over. In the sea of jobs available in the Seattle area I have been able to find a couple nonprofit ones that are up my alley, and so have taken the time to apply. And now starts the tedious waiting games. Most businesses like to remind you that they will contact you if they want to interview, which leaves you, the applicant, in the worst position of all (contacting them about your application is the HR kiss of death- the business world is all about rules and conduct). I have no idea if they want me or threw my resume in the reject pile simply because I have no timeline to work off of. There is no magical date by which I know to give up hope, and there is also the chance that six months from now I will get an email referencing a job I barely remember applying for. That's just the start of it though, because through interning I also understand the interview games and the tedium that they pull on an entirely separate and equally undefined timeline.
Yet I have this hope deep in my chest every time I get on to check my email. Despite all the no's I have received in life, my brain is addicted to the high of getting one simple yes, and that hope is what keeps pulling me back and opening my email with anticipation. I also get a certain satisfaction from pulling together a cover letter, resume, references, and writing sample that shows off what I can do and who I am. How often does life give you the chance to show-off what you have succeeded at in such defined terms while failures never have to be inked? I look at my resume and sometimes wonder who that person is, that list of accomplishments looking to hook my next job. Maybe that's why I like the business world. I never really quit the love of the game in high school athletics, and still seek that rush of winning every time I walk into an HR office. My hope is that the perfect job falls out of the sky, hits me on the head, and then I have nothing but happy little notes to leave on my blog. A girl can hope, right?
In other exciting Kennedy news....hmmm....nothing specifically, but I thought that sounded like an exciting way to pull the blog forward. Dereck and I are getting increasingly antsy for the Ft. Lewis move. I checked their MWR website today (office on post in charge of the welfare of Army families- ie gyms, daycares, events, restaurants- basically the fun stuff of a post). Sheer happiness followed as I looked at the six gyms they offer, one of which has free personal trainers who will make training workout schedules. I like other people telling me what to do, which makes me sometimes wish I still had a coach and expectations dragging my butt outside everyday. Lewis also has a super variety of classes and events offered and a calendar where you can click on an event and email reminders to yourself. Suffice it to say my inbox is going to have a deluge from MWR the next couple of weeks. Winter skiing weekend? Yes, remind me! Class on Army ranks and chain of command? Sure, why not! I am going to make friends if it kills me. We also get the exciting option of not knowing whether we get housing on post until we get there. I like to think of it as an adventure with two options. Get to Lewis, get post housing, and get handed a key. Or get to Lewis, get no post housing, and then frantically try to comb the entire Olympia/Tacoma housing market. You might be able to guess which option we are crossing our fingers for (hint: the free housing option). That of course is all dependent on us making our trek in one piece and not being snowed in anywhere, with Dereck tragically being killed for food, Donner party style (caravan of people who got snowed in at a pass in the Rocky Mtns and became cannibals! Crazy, but true).
Last night we went for a dinner out with a bunch of Dereck's friends from college to say farewell to a guy that is moving to Germany. I offered to be his travelling translator, but Dereck said no, much to my chagrin. We had a great time with all the friends sharing crazy stories from their training in EBOLC and even back into school, and stories about all the people they knew. Despite not knowing the people in the stories, I still laughed until my cheeks hurt. These Army people have a sense of humor, if nothing else. Most importantly I got to eat chips and salsa. Lots and lots of chips and salsa, and every bite was delicious I might add.
The best bit of news might be this: the stack of wedding thank-you letters is wonderfully near to done. I have finished the majority and now only have a few to be written by Dereck before we can close that chapter and never look back. My elation is indescribable at being so close to finished. At least I can say that I searched a million jobs in Seattle and did all the wedding thank-yous during my time here. I also am reading through the Bible in a year with my old church from Birmingham, and it is a chronological read-through, meaning that after Genesis the reading won't go in order of the books in the Bible. In classic Gena and Dereck style, we decided to do this and then promptly fell super behind and had to set a goal of being back on track at Week 5. This means that I am doing some serious reading during the day, and am happy to say that I am noticing some major trends and neat things that I never have before. The best part of admitting my behind the schedule issue is that I now have to be able to blog that I caught up. Whatever it takes. Motivation, motivation, motivation.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Fried Okra and Flying Rolls
I have just spent the day being utterly decadent and finishing a novel that I picked up at the library last weekend with Dereck. It was fantastic and one of those types that you can't put down, and are also so sad to finish. Like a bitter battle that you, the reader, face the entire time, so badly wanting to know what happens next and not wanting the page to turn to the last sentence. Reading has been something that I came to love as a child in Germany. My memories, being what they were as a five-year old, hold onto a slower life where there was always time to sit still and read. And that is precisely something I in my crazy life have clung to, and in seasons lost. That feeling of being able to put all the "important" things in life on hold and selfishly read for no one but myself. I can remember distinct times when the clock and time would start to run on a parallel sliding scale of measure. It was particularly strong in the beginning of high school when I stumbled onto so many of the classics that I still love today, and I began that passionate affair with 19th century British authors, caught in their tales of love, heart-ache, inspiration, and woe. I worked through Jane Austen's stories wanting to wear a petticoat and wait months for one brief letter from Darcy, and then realized in my impatient manner that would stink. Plain and simple. I hit works like Thomas Hardy and cried at major losses of youth, innocence, and love, and only now can wonder if he was a happy man or if the weight of his work transpired into his personal life. But enough revelations of my secret, inner-nerd. I love to read, and today I realized just how much I missed it in the push and pull of college life and the rat race to have it all, be it all, and do it all in four years.
The long weekend I am happy to report was a rousing success for the Kennedys in terms of exploration and relaxation. I met up with Dereck on Friday for an impromptu lunch and decided I would go to Starbucks on post that afternoon as a treat for it being Friday (and for lack of a better reason!). So, I went there and read the book I finished today, and met Dereck. It was a beautiful moment of reading our respective books and simply enjoying each other's company. And then it came to me: this is what it's like to be around the person you love enough to spend small moments with. And I liked it! We spent so long waiting for rushed weekend visits where every minute was crammed-packed in compensation for the time that would be spent separate. The small moments have been some of the most enjoyable in the marriage, and I don't think enough people tell you that. Forget the wedding and all the planning, this is a million times better than living for the big events.
Saturday morning we had a wonderfully lazy start to the day, complete with a pancake breakfast, and then climbed into the car for St. Louis. I was excited about this trip because we were headed for Fleet Feet, my favorite running shoe store in the world. To some people this may seem like a mundane task, something to check off the errand list, but to me going to a running store is an event to look forward to. I walk into the store and all the shoes are there on the shelves, calling me to try them on, and the expensive running clothes promise to make me look faster. Price tags reveal numbers small in comparison to what the running gear promises: adventure, fun, and a chance to slow down the day. Forget the fact that I am on the injury list and can gimp out a mile at my best right now, the running store is like heaven. I did seriously need shoes with better support, and Dereck's looked they they went through WWIII, and that says a lot coming from a runner. After getting fitted for new gear and me leaving with Brooks (gasp!) and Dereck with Asics, we went through a baby store so I could grab something for a friend that is due soon. The look of shock on Dereck's face was priceless. It took a grand total of ten minutes in the store, around all the bellies and babies for us to look at each other and agree that is a loooonnnnnngggg time from now before we are ready. Dereck also commented that the swaddling wraps looked like baby straight-jackets, and I think that says it all about our thoughts on childbearing for the time being.
Next in my oh-so exciting chronological expose would be Sunday. We again went to a small local Baptist church, then ate lunch, and later hit the gym. Army people are obsessed with fitness, and while I realize that their jobs require them to be that way, I have the feeling that most of them there were there of their own volition. So I spent my time riding my bike and again watching MTV. I am embarrassed to admit this on my blog, but darn it, they make some interesting documentaries and shows, and they are just mindless enough to be followed while I bike, drink water, fiddle with my headphone wire, watch people in the mirrors like a creeper, and plot out my domination of the world. Never knew someone could do so much on a bike did you? I must have been extra persuasive on Sunday, because I managed to convince Dereck we need to watch Army Wives, which I found at the library thanks to Ft. Leonard Wood. So watch we did, and to my great delight, several episodes. My whole thought-train on that show should really be saved for another day. Suffice it to say that I really enjoy watching the drama and want the world to know it. I seem to have a secret-revealing trend writing this today, I must be feeling bold and spicy like a Wendy's chicken sandwich, the hot one, not the plain and boring one.
To cap off the great weekend, Dereck and I explored the world-famous and acclaimed Branson. People in Missouri like billboards and they like filling them with flashy names done in sequins and catchy slogans that stretch over five in succession. The whole drive down I found myself being pulled into the tourist-glaze where every billboard seemed to promise something bigger and better than the last one, and by the time we got near Branson, I found myself ready to see the butterfly house, some weird Russian guy and anything in between. Perhaps I missed my life-calling and should have been a billboard designer- there were some serious stinkers out there that could use a redo. Having been to Gatlinburg, Tennessee a few times, I had my comparisons in mind and ready to go. Branson is very similar and very different. Branson has a much bigger focus on variety shows and musical entertainment theaters, and a downtown that isn't layed out on a strip along the major highway like in Gatlinburg. And personally, I found Gatlinburg to be much more pretty, but to also be fair, I haven't seen the full extent of Branson. We did pass one place with a Taj Mahal feel and purple and gold towers, and much to my glee it was a variety show with tigers. Sadly they were not open on Mondays. Also, the golden towers of tigers was next to a church that also claimed to be an event center. Ponder the irony of that with me for a moment: the house of God was also willing to host your next Bar Mitzvah or Bachelor Party, or any event for that matter. The desire for profit on the part of the glitzy church made me feel pretty sad. They must be watching TBN and that pink hair lady too much.
To round out the adventure of Monday we went to a Lambert's Cafe, the place where they throw you dinner rolls! I had heard of Lambert's before from friends that went to the one in Foley, AL, and when I saw the signs, I knew we had to go. Apparently the Lambert brothers started in Missouri and then one of them went rogue and moved to Alabama. Being a marketing person, I really have to give them props on their "atomospherics," or the mood of the restaurant. Here they had people paying $12for a meatloaf dinner, and the customers were loving it! From the bright lighting to the funny decorations, balloons, and waiters walking around with huge tubs of veggies like fried okra, the whole place felt alive. Dereck immediately fell in love with the fried okra and I am proud to say that I tried it and reconfirmed my dislike of 99% of all veggies, fried or not. The guys tossing rolls also made things much more fun since I never knew when one might go whizzing over my head. The portions however are out-of-this-world huge. After my monster roll, and nibbles off my meatloaf, potatoes, corn, applesauce, and samples from the tubs, I felt ready to pop. This has to be a place that people only go every so often. All in all though, we had a great dinner and shared laughs over tons of small, inconsequential things, and I firmly believe that our brains needed it. From all the stress of moving paperwork, coordination, housing info, and transportation issues coming up, we needed that time to unwind and giggle about how much fried okra Dereck could possibly consume.
To round off this blog post, we have come to the conclusion that I am going to follow Dereck out to Washington State on a three day driving bonanza. We have been trying to avoid this since I thought I needed to go home and help with the packing and PCS on that side, and adding 18 hours of driving to Alabama and back to Missouri on top of the drive out West was a bridge too far. So we looked into the options of shipping my car from Alabama and me flying out to some point on the journey to meet up with Dereck, or even flying all the way to Seattle. Every way that we tried to arrange it came up with issues and big costs. Moving is expensive no matter how you slice it or how much the Army "reimburses." I knew we came to the decision of driving when my parents offered to PCS all of our junk without me coming home. I am so blessed to have parents who played that game for 20 plus years and know all the tricks to use with movers from buying their lunches and giving them drinks throughout the day, to stashing items so that they don't get "lost" like 20% will on every move (aka stolen for the black market or personal pockets). I am currently trying to psych myself up that I can make the drive alone in my car for three days straight following Dereck. And to that end I put out a plea- if you have ever loved me in our short lives, please call and entertain me on that journey. You can only look at so many cornstalks in Kansas before the insanity starts to creep in (or should I say barren crop fields of February). We leave on the morning of Feb 2- mark it down and start praying!
The long weekend I am happy to report was a rousing success for the Kennedys in terms of exploration and relaxation. I met up with Dereck on Friday for an impromptu lunch and decided I would go to Starbucks on post that afternoon as a treat for it being Friday (and for lack of a better reason!). So, I went there and read the book I finished today, and met Dereck. It was a beautiful moment of reading our respective books and simply enjoying each other's company. And then it came to me: this is what it's like to be around the person you love enough to spend small moments with. And I liked it! We spent so long waiting for rushed weekend visits where every minute was crammed-packed in compensation for the time that would be spent separate. The small moments have been some of the most enjoyable in the marriage, and I don't think enough people tell you that. Forget the wedding and all the planning, this is a million times better than living for the big events.
Saturday morning we had a wonderfully lazy start to the day, complete with a pancake breakfast, and then climbed into the car for St. Louis. I was excited about this trip because we were headed for Fleet Feet, my favorite running shoe store in the world. To some people this may seem like a mundane task, something to check off the errand list, but to me going to a running store is an event to look forward to. I walk into the store and all the shoes are there on the shelves, calling me to try them on, and the expensive running clothes promise to make me look faster. Price tags reveal numbers small in comparison to what the running gear promises: adventure, fun, and a chance to slow down the day. Forget the fact that I am on the injury list and can gimp out a mile at my best right now, the running store is like heaven. I did seriously need shoes with better support, and Dereck's looked they they went through WWIII, and that says a lot coming from a runner. After getting fitted for new gear and me leaving with Brooks (gasp!) and Dereck with Asics, we went through a baby store so I could grab something for a friend that is due soon. The look of shock on Dereck's face was priceless. It took a grand total of ten minutes in the store, around all the bellies and babies for us to look at each other and agree that is a loooonnnnnngggg time from now before we are ready. Dereck also commented that the swaddling wraps looked like baby straight-jackets, and I think that says it all about our thoughts on childbearing for the time being.
Next in my oh-so exciting chronological expose would be Sunday. We again went to a small local Baptist church, then ate lunch, and later hit the gym. Army people are obsessed with fitness, and while I realize that their jobs require them to be that way, I have the feeling that most of them there were there of their own volition. So I spent my time riding my bike and again watching MTV. I am embarrassed to admit this on my blog, but darn it, they make some interesting documentaries and shows, and they are just mindless enough to be followed while I bike, drink water, fiddle with my headphone wire, watch people in the mirrors like a creeper, and plot out my domination of the world. Never knew someone could do so much on a bike did you? I must have been extra persuasive on Sunday, because I managed to convince Dereck we need to watch Army Wives, which I found at the library thanks to Ft. Leonard Wood. So watch we did, and to my great delight, several episodes. My whole thought-train on that show should really be saved for another day. Suffice it to say that I really enjoy watching the drama and want the world to know it. I seem to have a secret-revealing trend writing this today, I must be feeling bold and spicy like a Wendy's chicken sandwich, the hot one, not the plain and boring one.
To cap off the great weekend, Dereck and I explored the world-famous and acclaimed Branson. People in Missouri like billboards and they like filling them with flashy names done in sequins and catchy slogans that stretch over five in succession. The whole drive down I found myself being pulled into the tourist-glaze where every billboard seemed to promise something bigger and better than the last one, and by the time we got near Branson, I found myself ready to see the butterfly house, some weird Russian guy and anything in between. Perhaps I missed my life-calling and should have been a billboard designer- there were some serious stinkers out there that could use a redo. Having been to Gatlinburg, Tennessee a few times, I had my comparisons in mind and ready to go. Branson is very similar and very different. Branson has a much bigger focus on variety shows and musical entertainment theaters, and a downtown that isn't layed out on a strip along the major highway like in Gatlinburg. And personally, I found Gatlinburg to be much more pretty, but to also be fair, I haven't seen the full extent of Branson. We did pass one place with a Taj Mahal feel and purple and gold towers, and much to my glee it was a variety show with tigers. Sadly they were not open on Mondays. Also, the golden towers of tigers was next to a church that also claimed to be an event center. Ponder the irony of that with me for a moment: the house of God was also willing to host your next Bar Mitzvah or Bachelor Party, or any event for that matter. The desire for profit on the part of the glitzy church made me feel pretty sad. They must be watching TBN and that pink hair lady too much.
To round out the adventure of Monday we went to a Lambert's Cafe, the place where they throw you dinner rolls! I had heard of Lambert's before from friends that went to the one in Foley, AL, and when I saw the signs, I knew we had to go. Apparently the Lambert brothers started in Missouri and then one of them went rogue and moved to Alabama. Being a marketing person, I really have to give them props on their "atomospherics," or the mood of the restaurant. Here they had people paying $12for a meatloaf dinner, and the customers were loving it! From the bright lighting to the funny decorations, balloons, and waiters walking around with huge tubs of veggies like fried okra, the whole place felt alive. Dereck immediately fell in love with the fried okra and I am proud to say that I tried it and reconfirmed my dislike of 99% of all veggies, fried or not. The guys tossing rolls also made things much more fun since I never knew when one might go whizzing over my head. The portions however are out-of-this-world huge. After my monster roll, and nibbles off my meatloaf, potatoes, corn, applesauce, and samples from the tubs, I felt ready to pop. This has to be a place that people only go every so often. All in all though, we had a great dinner and shared laughs over tons of small, inconsequential things, and I firmly believe that our brains needed it. From all the stress of moving paperwork, coordination, housing info, and transportation issues coming up, we needed that time to unwind and giggle about how much fried okra Dereck could possibly consume.
To round off this blog post, we have come to the conclusion that I am going to follow Dereck out to Washington State on a three day driving bonanza. We have been trying to avoid this since I thought I needed to go home and help with the packing and PCS on that side, and adding 18 hours of driving to Alabama and back to Missouri on top of the drive out West was a bridge too far. So we looked into the options of shipping my car from Alabama and me flying out to some point on the journey to meet up with Dereck, or even flying all the way to Seattle. Every way that we tried to arrange it came up with issues and big costs. Moving is expensive no matter how you slice it or how much the Army "reimburses." I knew we came to the decision of driving when my parents offered to PCS all of our junk without me coming home. I am so blessed to have parents who played that game for 20 plus years and know all the tricks to use with movers from buying their lunches and giving them drinks throughout the day, to stashing items so that they don't get "lost" like 20% will on every move (aka stolen for the black market or personal pockets). I am currently trying to psych myself up that I can make the drive alone in my car for three days straight following Dereck. And to that end I put out a plea- if you have ever loved me in our short lives, please call and entertain me on that journey. You can only look at so many cornstalks in Kansas before the insanity starts to creep in (or should I say barren crop fields of February). We leave on the morning of Feb 2- mark it down and start praying!
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Bugle Call
It is early in the morning. Maybe not early by some people's standards, but early enough for me to still feel fuzzy around the edges. Dereck and I left my car on post yesterday afternoon, and as a result, I got the privilege of going on post with him this morning, and the rest of the entire state of Missouri(from the looks of the crowd at the front gate). I thought I was doing pretty well in being awake and looking perky till the gate guard asked if Dereck was taking me hostage. I asked him if my uncombed hair is what gave it away. True story. On the plus side, I did learn that Ft. Leonard Wood is capable of rush hour, something I would have lost a bet on beforehand. Part of me secretly wants to crawl back under the covers and close the curtains that I think they borrowed from Alaska (ala "blackout"). The other part of me has already put clothes in the washing machine downstairs and knows they will be done just as I managed to fall asleep again. Clothes seem to multiply and need to be washed much more often than when it was just me and my little contained life. Now I have ACUs and tan colored things running amuck in my room all the time. Sometimes I wonder if all of my belongings will begin to look like they are missing with the camouflage spread around. Maybe that is a good excuse to use later in life when things go missing. Not my fault, the camo is masking it all under a uniform blob.
One thing that I love about my living arrangements right now at the Extended Stay would be that I can hear half of the US Army leave their rooms at two distinct times every morning thanks to slamming doors. Most of the Army life revolves around these set times that provide structure to the day, and if I was living on post right now, the noises would be even louder and more frequent, like bugle call in the wee hours of the morning and the lowering of the flag at 5pm with trumpets over loud speakers. When I was younger the bugle would normally sound about 30min before my alarm, so if I ever did hear it I knew that I still had some precious sleep. Right now though, I have learned that 5:15am is the time of choice to leave if someone has PT (physical training, workouts, etc), and 7:05am is the next popular choice for people that are taking "gentleman's courses" without a PT requirement. Dereck falls into the latter of the two, so normally I only get to hear the 7:05am rush, with doors slamming and that familiar swish of the ACU pant as people head out for work.
This week I have undertaken the task of trying to make a dent in my wedding thank-you letters. Woe to any person that has to write them, and my apologies to the people that get them from me when I am in the middle of the stack. I am beginning to think that these things are like bunny rabbits. I get a few done and then my mom calls with 15 more that came in the mail, like yesterday. I wrote 21, and still have 80 odd ones to write, and this is all "wedding day and after" letters. The two months beforehand had a steady stream of letters going out each week in my attempt to tame the pile to a manageable size. Don't get me wrong, I love writing thank-you letters to people I know and can put a personal message on. It's the parents' friends and coworkers that are the tricky ones. Too late for holiday and new year notes, the average three sentences became stretched and, sometimes I fear, contrite. It all makes me much more sympathetic to the future thank-you letters I will receive post-wedding. The poor girl, she can't be witty, her hand is about to fall asleep while her mind is already fast gone. Stamps are expensive too, so while I am super super super appreciative of everything I have been blessed with, I feel like the work load and stamp expense even the playing field.
Besides writing my little hand off, I have been reading a great book I found at the library during my adventure there Sunday, pondering ways to revolutionize micro-lending alongside Grameen and the World Bank, and drafting my post-doctorate thesis on how B2B marketing will revolutionize the way businesses interact in the future, sketches of space-age rocket cars included. Dereck and I have also been cooking every night, and we had a re-match of Scrabble after my last domination, where he killed me. I blame my attention span and inability to spell- he won't let me use a dictionary! Perhaps it is because he knows I try to make-up words and bluff them as real until he calls me. Some people call it cheating, I call it "strategizing," to quote George W. The absolute highlight of the week though has been the addition of TV sets to each cardio machine at the gym. I think this is a sweet victory to me because they came after I started using the gym, making it feel much more like a reward than expectation. Yesterday I got to watch a girl try to become high school prom queen while climbing mountains on my stationary bike, and if that isn't motivating, what is? All joking aside though, I am very pumped about this whole business and would like to thank the MWR for digging down enough to not be cheap with Army families. I even watched some groups doing PT in the gym yesterday afternoon from an indoor track on the top and decided that I like my workouts much better than jump-roping, sit-ups, push-ups, and bridges with someone yelling rotate every minute or so.
Last night I met about 15 people that Dereck has known through EBOLC and EOCA, the school he did and the school he is now doing. It was some guy's birthday, but with everyone having the same haircut, things get a little confusing in a few moments. It was odd to be around Army guys, the guys who eat, sleep, and drink Army, and something I hadn't been subject to since my dad was active duty. I found that I had to go back to a mentality of being coolly disattached yet intensely interested that I haven't used since Kileen High School, and it took a bit to get back in the swing of the chatter, half of which never makes sense to the people outside the school or place or service branch. All said though, it was great to meet people and socially interact with Dereck next to me instead of across the country. Small glimpse of the life ahead and the life behind. I feel like I need to stretch and get ready again, to shake off the cobwebs and give myself a big "atta girl."
On the plus side, Dereck heard from the people he is going to be working under at Lewis, and he is very excited. Of course the Army being what it is, this could all change the day we move into our housing, but for now things are looking up for the Kennedys. Now I am praying that we can get housing. That would mean no utility bills, free maintenance, no rent, and no fiscal responsibility for selling the place, and the camaraderie of living around other like-minded families. I am optimistic about Lewis so far, and pray the trend continues. All that stands between me and the West Coast is driving back to Madison, packing everything I own, PCSing it, shipping my car, and flying out to Seattle. Maybe I should take a nap after all. Need all the strength I can get.
One thing that I love about my living arrangements right now at the Extended Stay would be that I can hear half of the US Army leave their rooms at two distinct times every morning thanks to slamming doors. Most of the Army life revolves around these set times that provide structure to the day, and if I was living on post right now, the noises would be even louder and more frequent, like bugle call in the wee hours of the morning and the lowering of the flag at 5pm with trumpets over loud speakers. When I was younger the bugle would normally sound about 30min before my alarm, so if I ever did hear it I knew that I still had some precious sleep. Right now though, I have learned that 5:15am is the time of choice to leave if someone has PT (physical training, workouts, etc), and 7:05am is the next popular choice for people that are taking "gentleman's courses" without a PT requirement. Dereck falls into the latter of the two, so normally I only get to hear the 7:05am rush, with doors slamming and that familiar swish of the ACU pant as people head out for work.
This week I have undertaken the task of trying to make a dent in my wedding thank-you letters. Woe to any person that has to write them, and my apologies to the people that get them from me when I am in the middle of the stack. I am beginning to think that these things are like bunny rabbits. I get a few done and then my mom calls with 15 more that came in the mail, like yesterday. I wrote 21, and still have 80 odd ones to write, and this is all "wedding day and after" letters. The two months beforehand had a steady stream of letters going out each week in my attempt to tame the pile to a manageable size. Don't get me wrong, I love writing thank-you letters to people I know and can put a personal message on. It's the parents' friends and coworkers that are the tricky ones. Too late for holiday and new year notes, the average three sentences became stretched and, sometimes I fear, contrite. It all makes me much more sympathetic to the future thank-you letters I will receive post-wedding. The poor girl, she can't be witty, her hand is about to fall asleep while her mind is already fast gone. Stamps are expensive too, so while I am super super super appreciative of everything I have been blessed with, I feel like the work load and stamp expense even the playing field.
Besides writing my little hand off, I have been reading a great book I found at the library during my adventure there Sunday, pondering ways to revolutionize micro-lending alongside Grameen and the World Bank, and drafting my post-doctorate thesis on how B2B marketing will revolutionize the way businesses interact in the future, sketches of space-age rocket cars included. Dereck and I have also been cooking every night, and we had a re-match of Scrabble after my last domination, where he killed me. I blame my attention span and inability to spell- he won't let me use a dictionary! Perhaps it is because he knows I try to make-up words and bluff them as real until he calls me. Some people call it cheating, I call it "strategizing," to quote George W. The absolute highlight of the week though has been the addition of TV sets to each cardio machine at the gym. I think this is a sweet victory to me because they came after I started using the gym, making it feel much more like a reward than expectation. Yesterday I got to watch a girl try to become high school prom queen while climbing mountains on my stationary bike, and if that isn't motivating, what is? All joking aside though, I am very pumped about this whole business and would like to thank the MWR for digging down enough to not be cheap with Army families. I even watched some groups doing PT in the gym yesterday afternoon from an indoor track on the top and decided that I like my workouts much better than jump-roping, sit-ups, push-ups, and bridges with someone yelling rotate every minute or so.
Last night I met about 15 people that Dereck has known through EBOLC and EOCA, the school he did and the school he is now doing. It was some guy's birthday, but with everyone having the same haircut, things get a little confusing in a few moments. It was odd to be around Army guys, the guys who eat, sleep, and drink Army, and something I hadn't been subject to since my dad was active duty. I found that I had to go back to a mentality of being coolly disattached yet intensely interested that I haven't used since Kileen High School, and it took a bit to get back in the swing of the chatter, half of which never makes sense to the people outside the school or place or service branch. All said though, it was great to meet people and socially interact with Dereck next to me instead of across the country. Small glimpse of the life ahead and the life behind. I feel like I need to stretch and get ready again, to shake off the cobwebs and give myself a big "atta girl."
On the plus side, Dereck heard from the people he is going to be working under at Lewis, and he is very excited. Of course the Army being what it is, this could all change the day we move into our housing, but for now things are looking up for the Kennedys. Now I am praying that we can get housing. That would mean no utility bills, free maintenance, no rent, and no fiscal responsibility for selling the place, and the camaraderie of living around other like-minded families. I am optimistic about Lewis so far, and pray the trend continues. All that stands between me and the West Coast is driving back to Madison, packing everything I own, PCSing it, shipping my car, and flying out to Seattle. Maybe I should take a nap after all. Need all the strength I can get.
Monday, January 11, 2010
City Lights
I am happy to say that the stomach flu finally subsided towards the end of the week, and I was back to myself in time to enjoy the weekend. Friday night Dereck brought home "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs," and for all you skeptics out there, it is awesome. Really, we had to watch it Friday and then finish it on Saturday night because, I am sad to admit this, the food theme made me feel sick. Even typing that is funny to me since it seems unrealistic that an animated movie about food could make someone sick, but here I am as living proof. Blame it on really good graphics. That said, get in touch with your inner child and rent it. There is a talking monkey named Steve, and he basically made the movie for me.
Saturday morning I was finally feeling good enough to venture out of my little dark room of sickness and head towards St. Louis. Dereck and I like to use the weekends as a time for us to get away from Ft. Leonard Wood and relax, minus the school stress for him and the routine for me. St. Louis was the winner this time for the simple fact that it had a David's Bridal, and with Lydia getting married in April, I really needed to figure out what size bridesmaid dress I needed. Then, as we were driving down I-44, Dereck and I were joking about things St. Louis-famous, and it hit us like a ton of bricks- The Budweiser Brewery. Being a good Alabama girl for the time I was there, I have been to the Jack Daniels Distillery and thought it was a great tour even though I am not a fan of either Jack or Bud- but a free tour is a free tour! So, Dereck looked up the info, and we could easily make an afternoon one after stopping at a St. Louis Bread Co. for lunch (or Panera outside of the city). We ate in this super neat area of town that seemed to be the intersection of young artsy kids, rich old people, and hobos for good measure. No joke, the hobos kept coming in and out of the place and no one seemed to care, especially Dereck and me since we happily poor and newlywed. I imagine a hobo would feel quite cheated if he tried to pit pocket me.
Saturday was also awesome because it finally felt like it was almost, perhaps, just maybe, above freezing. I never thought that the sound of 30 degrees could have me so excited, but I am learning to take what I am given by Missouri weather. When we got the Budweiser Brewery we learned that we were just in time for the next tour, so off we went, learning all about how to make beer. Even though Budweiser has German roots, I am still pretty sure that my ancestors were all rolling in their graves to hear that I was so disloyal. The absolute highlight of the tour was seeing the giant horses and dalmatians from the commercials. The dogs really do hangout with the horses all the time, and they used to be guard dogs for deliveries. Who knew? They even know how to run out and work the crowd for petting and photos- I think they have a pretty sweet life between that and parades of adoring little kids and adults alike. The frattie patties in front of me were pretty stoked about the entire tour and kept making bets on how much Bud they could down in a timed contest. Dereck simply asked me why they all had work boots, khakis, North Face fleeces, and Costa Del Mar shades on the back of their necks (he missed the whole Greek life thing of "normal" college as I like to call it).
We managed to wrap up the venture by going to David's Bridal- God bless all people who work, visit, or deal with that store. The whole trip was traumatizing to Dereck to be around so many females, dresses, and accessories, and all I could think as we left was how happy I was to have a huge check mark next to that item in the books. And, like I mentioned above, we finished the awesome movie with Steve the talking monkey.
Sunday we tried a new church off-post since Chapels sometimes leave something to be desired. Now, I am not knocking Chapels as I basically grew up in one and my Grandpa was a Chaplain, but sometimes you need to be weaned off the milk for more sustaining meat. We tried a First-Baptist of Waynesville, and true to the Baptist Creed (I am sure this exists somewhere deep between the lines), we sang all the verses to Amazing Grace. Joking aside, it was a good church and service, and we just might be making a return trip next week, you never know. After lunch and changing into more comfortable clothes, we headed to the library so Dereck could study. Normally I am pretty good about sitting still if there is something I need to get done, but since I didn't, I ended up wandering the stacks for a good while.
Here are the important things you need to know from the Fort Leonard Wood library. 1) You can rent paintings that they have hung on a wall. That's right. Should your barracks plain cinder block walls be bothering you, you can check out art work from the front desk. Your choices include ducks, ponds, clowns, and flowers, so pick wisely. 2) There is a surprisingly extensive foreign language section full of books that somehow made it out of the 70s and 80s in one piece. I perused the German section for a good while enjoying titles like "The Philosophers and their Philosophies" and "Making Your Garden Greener." 3) The Teen section has lots of books about vampires and dragons. Those must be the cool thing now-a-days. 4)The magazine portion includes some with questionable covers like GQ, at kiddie eye level. 5) There are a ton of TV shows I have never even heard of, as evidenced by the digital entertainment section. 6) I am mighty good at tearing pieces of paper in half- this really has nothing to do with the library, but Dereck needed help doing it, and I figured it fell under the wifely duty realm.
Then, to round out the day, we went to the commissary to get some much needed groceries. I like the variety of people there- from the crazy looking man that cuts our Cajun-style turkey that smells up every corner of a kitchen and Dereck has to have, to the teenage kids that work for tips by bagging and pushing buggies, to the men shopping alone without that starry look of fear, to the poor mom with six screaming kids, three buggies full, and a cell phone ringing, then to the newlyweds trying to figure out what the heck to make for dinner- the commissary has it all. I am super proud to say that Dereck and I made a real dinner complete with chicken, corn, and sweet potatoes that I managed to not explode in the microwave. It's all in the small victories of the day.
Today I went to a spin class at the gym on post, and while it is a rapid departure from what I did at Gold's in Bham, it is $2, and who can beat $2? It was nice to be around the network of women who all know each other and the friendly chatter. I even met a woman who is running the Mercedes-Benz half in Bham this year (I had my t-shirt from last year on), and another one who is from Bham. People always say the Army is a small world, and it would be cliche if it wasn't true every other minute. Even in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the US, I am never far from the familiar.
Saturday morning I was finally feeling good enough to venture out of my little dark room of sickness and head towards St. Louis. Dereck and I like to use the weekends as a time for us to get away from Ft. Leonard Wood and relax, minus the school stress for him and the routine for me. St. Louis was the winner this time for the simple fact that it had a David's Bridal, and with Lydia getting married in April, I really needed to figure out what size bridesmaid dress I needed. Then, as we were driving down I-44, Dereck and I were joking about things St. Louis-famous, and it hit us like a ton of bricks- The Budweiser Brewery. Being a good Alabama girl for the time I was there, I have been to the Jack Daniels Distillery and thought it was a great tour even though I am not a fan of either Jack or Bud- but a free tour is a free tour! So, Dereck looked up the info, and we could easily make an afternoon one after stopping at a St. Louis Bread Co. for lunch (or Panera outside of the city). We ate in this super neat area of town that seemed to be the intersection of young artsy kids, rich old people, and hobos for good measure. No joke, the hobos kept coming in and out of the place and no one seemed to care, especially Dereck and me since we happily poor and newlywed. I imagine a hobo would feel quite cheated if he tried to pit pocket me.
Saturday was also awesome because it finally felt like it was almost, perhaps, just maybe, above freezing. I never thought that the sound of 30 degrees could have me so excited, but I am learning to take what I am given by Missouri weather. When we got the Budweiser Brewery we learned that we were just in time for the next tour, so off we went, learning all about how to make beer. Even though Budweiser has German roots, I am still pretty sure that my ancestors were all rolling in their graves to hear that I was so disloyal. The absolute highlight of the tour was seeing the giant horses and dalmatians from the commercials. The dogs really do hangout with the horses all the time, and they used to be guard dogs for deliveries. Who knew? They even know how to run out and work the crowd for petting and photos- I think they have a pretty sweet life between that and parades of adoring little kids and adults alike. The frattie patties in front of me were pretty stoked about the entire tour and kept making bets on how much Bud they could down in a timed contest. Dereck simply asked me why they all had work boots, khakis, North Face fleeces, and Costa Del Mar shades on the back of their necks (he missed the whole Greek life thing of "normal" college as I like to call it).
We managed to wrap up the venture by going to David's Bridal- God bless all people who work, visit, or deal with that store. The whole trip was traumatizing to Dereck to be around so many females, dresses, and accessories, and all I could think as we left was how happy I was to have a huge check mark next to that item in the books. And, like I mentioned above, we finished the awesome movie with Steve the talking monkey.
Sunday we tried a new church off-post since Chapels sometimes leave something to be desired. Now, I am not knocking Chapels as I basically grew up in one and my Grandpa was a Chaplain, but sometimes you need to be weaned off the milk for more sustaining meat. We tried a First-Baptist of Waynesville, and true to the Baptist Creed (I am sure this exists somewhere deep between the lines), we sang all the verses to Amazing Grace. Joking aside, it was a good church and service, and we just might be making a return trip next week, you never know. After lunch and changing into more comfortable clothes, we headed to the library so Dereck could study. Normally I am pretty good about sitting still if there is something I need to get done, but since I didn't, I ended up wandering the stacks for a good while.
Here are the important things you need to know from the Fort Leonard Wood library. 1) You can rent paintings that they have hung on a wall. That's right. Should your barracks plain cinder block walls be bothering you, you can check out art work from the front desk. Your choices include ducks, ponds, clowns, and flowers, so pick wisely. 2) There is a surprisingly extensive foreign language section full of books that somehow made it out of the 70s and 80s in one piece. I perused the German section for a good while enjoying titles like "The Philosophers and their Philosophies" and "Making Your Garden Greener." 3) The Teen section has lots of books about vampires and dragons. Those must be the cool thing now-a-days. 4)The magazine portion includes some with questionable covers like GQ, at kiddie eye level. 5) There are a ton of TV shows I have never even heard of, as evidenced by the digital entertainment section. 6) I am mighty good at tearing pieces of paper in half- this really has nothing to do with the library, but Dereck needed help doing it, and I figured it fell under the wifely duty realm.
Then, to round out the day, we went to the commissary to get some much needed groceries. I like the variety of people there- from the crazy looking man that cuts our Cajun-style turkey that smells up every corner of a kitchen and Dereck has to have, to the teenage kids that work for tips by bagging and pushing buggies, to the men shopping alone without that starry look of fear, to the poor mom with six screaming kids, three buggies full, and a cell phone ringing, then to the newlyweds trying to figure out what the heck to make for dinner- the commissary has it all. I am super proud to say that Dereck and I made a real dinner complete with chicken, corn, and sweet potatoes that I managed to not explode in the microwave. It's all in the small victories of the day.
Today I went to a spin class at the gym on post, and while it is a rapid departure from what I did at Gold's in Bham, it is $2, and who can beat $2? It was nice to be around the network of women who all know each other and the friendly chatter. I even met a woman who is running the Mercedes-Benz half in Bham this year (I had my t-shirt from last year on), and another one who is from Bham. People always say the Army is a small world, and it would be cliche if it wasn't true every other minute. Even in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the US, I am never far from the familiar.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Delirium
I fear that Missouri may have been hearing what I said about it the other day, and hit me with a stomach virus in return. Shortly after finishing my first blog on Tuesday afternoon, and guilt-tripping myself into writing some wedding thank-you letters, I started to feel a rumble in my tummy. The kind of rumble that makes you want to run home to mommy and ask her to make it go away. Luckily, it went away, and after finishing my thank-you letters, I played Wii while Dereck was off with buddies studying for a bomb school test. I actually was feeling fine by the time he got home, and we had a late dinner of spaghetti. This then led to me naturally having a craving for something sweet, so I told Dereck that the only thing that would satiate the craving was ice-cream, but now that I think about it, the wind chill was negative, so I am not quite sure what on earth kicked that off.
Now for a quick question: How many people know that there exist Sonics that are not 24 hours? St. Robert, Missouri is one such place, so we had to go to McDonald's, and I happily got a fudge sundae. To type that now even makes my stomach hurt. At this point though, I was still feeling ok, and helped Dereck run through a massive stack of note cards for his test, and then told him I wasn't feeling too hot. I am not one to get stomach sick. Ever. So when I woke up at 3am, I knew it was not a good sign. I floated between being sick and trying to sleep until Dereck got home around 1pm on Wednesday, and that is about the time he told me we were going to the ER. I think I told him something along the lines of "leave me alone" and "no."
So naturally, next thing I know we are sitting in the ER and the nurse is asking me the last four digits of Dereck's SSN. This is something the Army does. The sponsor (or husband/father) and his SSN is the way that you are identified for anything related to the Army. Do they care that you have an SSN? No! Have I bothered to memorize Dereck's in all three weeks of marriage? No! In fact I think I gave them my dad's SSN that I pulled from somewhere deep in the recess of my brain. The good part about not being able to hold down liquids and being very dehydrated is that you get to the back much faster than other patients. I remember thinking "suckas!" as they took me back, and everyone else just sat in the waiting room.
I did get to wear a hospital gown and march around with my backside exposed to the whole hospital staff while taking urine tests and such. Funny what things you don't care about when you aren't feeling well. Luckily Dereck was there with me for the whole duration, and I can now say that IV bags take forever to empty- they made me finish two of them! Somewhere between sleeping and asking Dereck very non-coherent questions, the nurse asked if I could be pregnant. And I said heck no! And Dereck then admits that he looked up morning sickness before appendicitis on WebMD when deciding whether to take me to the ER. That's right, Dereck checked to see if I was pregnant before he checked whether my insides where ballooning up to the point of explosion. I would have punched him for this, had I had any strength left in my little arm. Happily, I can now say that I am not pregnant, in case you might be wondering, and don't plan to be for a good while. I also woke up at one point during the sick days, looked at Dereck on the couch, looked at the clock that said 8:30, and then asked him if it was am or pm. I honestly had no idea, and he would have been at school had it been 8:30am, so I am not sure where that came from in my brain, but at the moment it seemed like a very valid question.
Since the exciting trip to the ER I came back home and slept, and then stayed awake for a grand total of 2 hours yesterday, and missed the entire national championship game. Luckily my mom and Lydia called while I was awake yesterday, but I cannot vouch for any coherency on my part. Even today I still feel pretty groggy and should probably not be writing my blog in such a condition. So there. Even though spaghetti and fudge sundaes might be on the "do not eat list" for a good while, I do know that Dereck is taking his vows seriously in the whole sickness and health thing. Today I have showered, cleaned the kitchen, done some laundry, and written here, and to me that is way more than I can say for the previous two days. Now I am thinking a nap sounds like heaven, but I plan on making it shorter than the earlier ones.
Now for a quick question: How many people know that there exist Sonics that are not 24 hours? St. Robert, Missouri is one such place, so we had to go to McDonald's, and I happily got a fudge sundae. To type that now even makes my stomach hurt. At this point though, I was still feeling ok, and helped Dereck run through a massive stack of note cards for his test, and then told him I wasn't feeling too hot. I am not one to get stomach sick. Ever. So when I woke up at 3am, I knew it was not a good sign. I floated between being sick and trying to sleep until Dereck got home around 1pm on Wednesday, and that is about the time he told me we were going to the ER. I think I told him something along the lines of "leave me alone" and "no."
So naturally, next thing I know we are sitting in the ER and the nurse is asking me the last four digits of Dereck's SSN. This is something the Army does. The sponsor (or husband/father) and his SSN is the way that you are identified for anything related to the Army. Do they care that you have an SSN? No! Have I bothered to memorize Dereck's in all three weeks of marriage? No! In fact I think I gave them my dad's SSN that I pulled from somewhere deep in the recess of my brain. The good part about not being able to hold down liquids and being very dehydrated is that you get to the back much faster than other patients. I remember thinking "suckas!" as they took me back, and everyone else just sat in the waiting room.
I did get to wear a hospital gown and march around with my backside exposed to the whole hospital staff while taking urine tests and such. Funny what things you don't care about when you aren't feeling well. Luckily Dereck was there with me for the whole duration, and I can now say that IV bags take forever to empty- they made me finish two of them! Somewhere between sleeping and asking Dereck very non-coherent questions, the nurse asked if I could be pregnant. And I said heck no! And Dereck then admits that he looked up morning sickness before appendicitis on WebMD when deciding whether to take me to the ER. That's right, Dereck checked to see if I was pregnant before he checked whether my insides where ballooning up to the point of explosion. I would have punched him for this, had I had any strength left in my little arm. Happily, I can now say that I am not pregnant, in case you might be wondering, and don't plan to be for a good while. I also woke up at one point during the sick days, looked at Dereck on the couch, looked at the clock that said 8:30, and then asked him if it was am or pm. I honestly had no idea, and he would have been at school had it been 8:30am, so I am not sure where that came from in my brain, but at the moment it seemed like a very valid question.
Since the exciting trip to the ER I came back home and slept, and then stayed awake for a grand total of 2 hours yesterday, and missed the entire national championship game. Luckily my mom and Lydia called while I was awake yesterday, but I cannot vouch for any coherency on my part. Even today I still feel pretty groggy and should probably not be writing my blog in such a condition. So there. Even though spaghetti and fudge sundaes might be on the "do not eat list" for a good while, I do know that Dereck is taking his vows seriously in the whole sickness and health thing. Today I have showered, cleaned the kitchen, done some laundry, and written here, and to me that is way more than I can say for the previous two days. Now I am thinking a nap sounds like heaven, but I plan on making it shorter than the earlier ones.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Life in the Woods
Growing up as an Army brat led me to believe that I knew "the ropes" of this whole Army thing. Even when I was engaged to Dereck, I still held the idea that I was good to go, and now that theory is getting tested. Big time. Two days after we returned from our honeymoon we got in our respective cars and made the gruelling trip to Ft. Leonard Wood, Missouri. I had seen the post one time before when I made a trip out to see Dereck during one of his schooling sessions. My impression was that it was small, but overall not too shabby. Now that I have been here just under a week, I have no great anger or hatred towards the place, but really understand what Dereck was saying when he called it "Fort Lost in the Woods." I live out by a Cracker Barrel and Walmart, which serve as the two flagships for people on Interstate 44 to acknowledge there is a semblance of people living in a town here.
The lack of civilization around Ft. Leonard Wood only seems to stand out when I make trips to surrounding towns and realize what all is different. One might think that after four years of living in a city for college, this difference might be exacerbated. And perhaps it would, if I were living here long term. The fact that I am only here for four weeks serves as a sanity check, and even though the odds that we might return are great, I cling to the hope that I will be more integrated into the Army spouse life and able to create order in my day.
The choice to come out here with Dereck meant leaving my full time job, and while I miss the work I was doing, it is still a choice I would make again. Dating long distance for two years can make even the most isolated places sound like heaven so long as that loved one is there with you. And that is exactly why I smile despite the lack of job, entertainment, or civilization. Right now I am working on finding a rhythm to the day since that always made me feel the most settled in college. I have a list of things next to my computer that I need to accomplish during this hiatus, but somehow fixing up my resume, writing wedding thank you letters, and finishing the New York Times crossword puzzle hit the back burner first and foremost.
Today I decided that I would look at this month as time for personal reflection and polishing. This is my decision in the face that nobody hires for a month only, and my personal drive to be contributing to society. Dereck says that this should be my time to rest and relax, given my tendency to push pretty hard. Some moments are better than others for going along with this idea. So far I have noticed that the days tend to have a pattern of satisfaction and worry that seem to cycle around one another. I will work up towards the point of feeling good, and then something in the back of my head tells me that I am being lazy and not productive. Call it too much energy and not enough attention.
My mom says that I should focus on exercising and cooking, the first of which is going per normal, and the second of which isn't going at all. And I know that some people out there at this point would shake their heads and laugh, thinking "Gena hates cooking." But above that is the fact that I am normally not in the mood, and just as easily satisfied with sandwiches. And with the fact that Dereck gets home at a different time everyday and that I have one stove eye and no oven to work with, and you can get the idea of where this is going. The gym has a ton of classes offered, and I even got a schedule of them, but so far have only tried the spin class. My lack of coordination and the feeling that aerobic classes never really do it for me are currently inhibiting me from trying, but the ambition is there.
On the upswing for today was grabbing a quick lunch with Dereck and then heading out to explore the metropolis of Rolla, Missouri. Armed with only the knowledge that they had a Panera Bread Co., and some type of college, I had no specific expectations. The housing I did see in my ramblings surprised me. It was quaint in the 1950s style that has been well up kept and it was easy for me to imagine what the place might have looked like back "in the day." I also found a downtown area that correlated in age to the houses, and the campus of Missouri University of Science and Technology. I later read on the Internet that there is supposed to be some type of Stonehenge structure there, but the giant primordial stones alluded my cruising of the strip. And, true to Dereck's promise, there was a Panera, and the overpriced coffee and bagel smell beckoned me. I ended up spending an hour or so sitting and reading, and let's be honest, people watching. Sometimes I think I missed my calling as an anthropologist. People, especially in social situations, are intensely interesting.
At a table near me sat a group of mixed ages of women. I first thought bible study, but the lack of bibles and talk around stables, tacks, and horses, led me to the conclusion of horse riders. Clever, I know. There was also an abnormally large amount of professionals in the place taking advantage of the free wifi, which led me to then wonder where the heck they worked. Rolla must be more industrialized than I realized- maybe the campus or hospital. It only struck me as I left that this Panera was called Panera, and not St. Louis Bread Co., which is actually where it originated. I thought that they only changed it to Panera out-of-state, but apparently this is not so.
After drinking all my mocha, pretending to read, and people watching as long as I could without being detected, I headed back down the interstate towards Ft. Leonard Wood with thoughts on what my adventure should be tomorrow. This whole sitting back, relaxing, and learning to not be over-booked business is hard, and I still feel myself fighting against it.
The lack of civilization around Ft. Leonard Wood only seems to stand out when I make trips to surrounding towns and realize what all is different. One might think that after four years of living in a city for college, this difference might be exacerbated. And perhaps it would, if I were living here long term. The fact that I am only here for four weeks serves as a sanity check, and even though the odds that we might return are great, I cling to the hope that I will be more integrated into the Army spouse life and able to create order in my day.
The choice to come out here with Dereck meant leaving my full time job, and while I miss the work I was doing, it is still a choice I would make again. Dating long distance for two years can make even the most isolated places sound like heaven so long as that loved one is there with you. And that is exactly why I smile despite the lack of job, entertainment, or civilization. Right now I am working on finding a rhythm to the day since that always made me feel the most settled in college. I have a list of things next to my computer that I need to accomplish during this hiatus, but somehow fixing up my resume, writing wedding thank you letters, and finishing the New York Times crossword puzzle hit the back burner first and foremost.
Today I decided that I would look at this month as time for personal reflection and polishing. This is my decision in the face that nobody hires for a month only, and my personal drive to be contributing to society. Dereck says that this should be my time to rest and relax, given my tendency to push pretty hard. Some moments are better than others for going along with this idea. So far I have noticed that the days tend to have a pattern of satisfaction and worry that seem to cycle around one another. I will work up towards the point of feeling good, and then something in the back of my head tells me that I am being lazy and not productive. Call it too much energy and not enough attention.
My mom says that I should focus on exercising and cooking, the first of which is going per normal, and the second of which isn't going at all. And I know that some people out there at this point would shake their heads and laugh, thinking "Gena hates cooking." But above that is the fact that I am normally not in the mood, and just as easily satisfied with sandwiches. And with the fact that Dereck gets home at a different time everyday and that I have one stove eye and no oven to work with, and you can get the idea of where this is going. The gym has a ton of classes offered, and I even got a schedule of them, but so far have only tried the spin class. My lack of coordination and the feeling that aerobic classes never really do it for me are currently inhibiting me from trying, but the ambition is there.
On the upswing for today was grabbing a quick lunch with Dereck and then heading out to explore the metropolis of Rolla, Missouri. Armed with only the knowledge that they had a Panera Bread Co., and some type of college, I had no specific expectations. The housing I did see in my ramblings surprised me. It was quaint in the 1950s style that has been well up kept and it was easy for me to imagine what the place might have looked like back "in the day." I also found a downtown area that correlated in age to the houses, and the campus of Missouri University of Science and Technology. I later read on the Internet that there is supposed to be some type of Stonehenge structure there, but the giant primordial stones alluded my cruising of the strip. And, true to Dereck's promise, there was a Panera, and the overpriced coffee and bagel smell beckoned me. I ended up spending an hour or so sitting and reading, and let's be honest, people watching. Sometimes I think I missed my calling as an anthropologist. People, especially in social situations, are intensely interesting.
At a table near me sat a group of mixed ages of women. I first thought bible study, but the lack of bibles and talk around stables, tacks, and horses, led me to the conclusion of horse riders. Clever, I know. There was also an abnormally large amount of professionals in the place taking advantage of the free wifi, which led me to then wonder where the heck they worked. Rolla must be more industrialized than I realized- maybe the campus or hospital. It only struck me as I left that this Panera was called Panera, and not St. Louis Bread Co., which is actually where it originated. I thought that they only changed it to Panera out-of-state, but apparently this is not so.
After drinking all my mocha, pretending to read, and people watching as long as I could without being detected, I headed back down the interstate towards Ft. Leonard Wood with thoughts on what my adventure should be tomorrow. This whole sitting back, relaxing, and learning to not be over-booked business is hard, and I still feel myself fighting against it.
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